How to make your own custom Ringtones for the iPhone

So, the wonderful magic elves at apple plugged a special workaround for the solution of paying 99¢ for ringtones. all you need is a Mac with Garage band, an 1/8 inch computer speaker cord, and everything that came with your iPhone.
Here's a little walk through.
1. If you haven't already, activate your iphone and
connect it to your Mac through the dock that comes with your iphone.
This is important, your phone must be connected to the dock!

2. Connect the power cord (the white one that works with ipods) into the back of the dock. The other end connects to the USB connection on your Mac.

3. The speaker cord (black and green in this picture) connects to your dock, and into the INPUT jack on your computer, shown to the right.

Alright, you're ready to make your first ringtone! For this example, I'm going to use 'Pride and Joy' by SRV.

4. Upload the song to your iPhone via iTunes.
5. Open Garage band and start a new Project. SAVE!
7. Select "real instrument track", and set your input source to "Stereo 1/2 (Built-in Audio)". If you've followed the instructions correctly, this will let Garage Band record music straight from your iPhone, without the loss of sound quality. This is the key to getting garage band to record your ringtones.
Make sure that you have the metronome turned off: Control > Metronome (command + U)

8. Select your song on your iPhone.
9. Begin recording, then play about 30-40 seconds of your song.

when you're done garage band should look like this:


you can have the beginning fade in and out if you're Garage Band savvy. Make sure and Loop the section that you want to use for your ring tone.


10. Save the file one more time, then click: Share > Send Ringtone to iTunes.




Sync your iPhone with iTunes and you're ready to amaze your friends with this amazing loophole.

Thanks for Reading!

Papa Bear Bill-O

There had better be a special circle of hell reserved for Bill O'reilly. One with demons hanging him upside down and pouring water on his face, all the while reassuring him that it isn't torture. I'm proud of my Fox Lies Constantly (courtesy goats.com) and applaud bloggers and readers everywhere for underminding the mainstreme media that decides what we hear and what we don't. If you're still getting your news from tv, wise up and kill your emp-t-v.

Its too late for us now.

And for the record...

visit my podcast.

Playing Along

First, it was the advertisements.
Then, the direct opposition common in rebellious teenage males.
Then, my friends was a realization.
An epiphany of sorts,
That I was really fucking good at it.

See, I've spent most my evening catching up on propaganda.
And what ever time i didn't spend on the propaganda I spend just being generally pissed off about the whole situation. I fumed. Oh, I fumed. I begged for the God of the Old testament to bring down fire upon my suppressors, those lying sons of bitches in the news media, and to bring on the apocalypse just so I could some how feel justified in being lied to so bad. and about how motherfucking stupid everybody really is.

and how maybe a good biological attack is just what we need. a good bubonic plauge. West nile. Sars. Aids. Bird Flu. these epidemiological promised plagues that thin the heards; not enough to kill everyone, mind you, but just enough to teach the few survivors the error of their ways.

I swear, God gave us a hard task when he asked us his great commission. Converting men? I can't even convert myself. I hate to say it God, but you might as well bring your fire and brimstone now, cause humanity is a lost cause. You know what I mean.

Either this is a calling, or I'm going COMPLETELY FUCKING INSANE.

Vigamox®

It was three days ago. A doctor I saw in the phone book told me I have a cornial ulcer. It's where all the bacteria clinging to my contact lenses decide to start digging into my eye.

I have a little bottle of prescription liquid antibiotic that I drop in my eyes every hour, on the hour. It burns, but in a good way. I feel it drip down my nasal passages and down the back of my throat. It has the bitter taste of medication when you take to long to wash it down.

But, I need my eyes. Ten years ago, I'd be getting this stuff through an IV.

I should count my blessings.

Meme time....

Q: How many Soviet Russians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. In Soviet Russia, the light bulb changes you!